Glossary terms beginning with O

17 terms · O of the glossary

The plain-language glossary behind The Architecture of Intimacy — a field guide to 369 green flags of healthy relationships.

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Terms beginning with O

observational observational study
Describing research that watches what naturally happens without assigning people to conditions, so it can show links but cannot prove one thing causes another. Appears in flag 289
offer of repair
One of six apology components researchers name: a commitment to undo the damage done and to act differently going forward, not just to express regret. Appears in flag 249 See also: amends, repair attempt
OLIW model OLIW
A four-part map of adult playfulness — Other-directed, Lighthearted, Intellectual, and Whimsical — describing different flavors of how a person brings play into daily life. Appears in flags 155, 163 See also: other-directed playfulness, playfulness
operationalize operationalization
To turn a loose concept into something a study can actually measure, by defining it concretely enough for researchers to test. Appears in flag 297
Oral History Interview
A research interview in which couples tell the story of their relationship — how they met, hard times, beliefs about marriage — coded for how the story is told. Appears in flags 172, 332 See also: glorifying the struggle, we-ness
oscillation (grief sense) oscillation
The natural back-and-forth of grieving — moving between engaging the loss and taking breaks to handle life — uneven, personal, and healthy rather than a sign of relapse. Appears in flag 267 See also: dual process model, loss-oriented coping, restoration-oriented coping
ostracism silent treatment
Being ignored, excluded, or given the silent treatment — an experience that strikes at basic needs to belong, feel worthy, feel in control, and feel that you matter. Appears in flag 74 See also: stonewalling
other-directed playfulness
Playfulness aimed warmly at another person — good-natured teasing, clowning, and cheering them up — rather than play kept to yourself or aimed only at ideas. Appears in flags 163, 169 See also: OLIW model, playfulness
other-praising thanks other-praising · other-praising behavior · other-praising gratitude · specific other-praising thanks
A thank-you that points at the giver — naming their thoughtfulness, character, or the good thing the act revealed — rather than only reporting how the favor helped you. Appears in flags 6, 241, 252, 253, 257, 334 See also: cost-highlighting, find, remind, and bind
otherness
Experiencing your partner as a distinct, separate person — seeing them in a new light or learning something surprising about them — rather than as fully known and merged with you. Appears in flag 319 See also: celebrated otherness, self-expansion
outing outed
The disclosure of someone's sexual orientation or gender identity to others without that person's consent. Appears in flag 201 See also: concealment, minority stress
outness
How openly a person's sexual or gender identity — and their relationship — is known to family, friends, and the wider social world. Appears in flag 108
outness discrepancy
When two partners are out to different degrees, so one person's disclosure timeline can pull on the other's — a common strain in LGBTQ+ couples. Appears in flag 200 See also: concealment, minority stress
over-benefited
In fairness terms, getting more from a relationship than you give — a position that tends to bring mild guilt or unease rather than resentment. Appears in flag 338 See also: equity theory, under-benefited
overgeneralization
Treating one or a few events as proof of an unbreakable pattern — a single bad instance becoming "always" or "never" in your mind or your words. Appears in flag 35 See also: criticism (Gottman sense), gentle start-up
ownership
Taking a household task from start to finish, including noticing it needs doing and handling its planning — not just executing a step after someone else flags it. Appears in flag 136 See also: manager/helper trap, mental load
oxytocin endogenous oxytocin · plasma oxytocin · salivary oxytocin
A hormone the body produces that is involved in social bonding and closeness, which researchers measure in blood or saliva as a marker of the body's response to warm contact. Appears in flags 152, 229, 314